Jarring Encounters: Discomfort, Disruption, and Dominant Narratives of Suicide.

In researching experiences and understandings of suicide bereavement across diverse communities in Scotland, we expected to hear difficult, distressing, and painful narratives. However, one of the 31 in-depth qualitative interviews that we conducted was particularly and unexpectedly jarring. In this narrative, Freya explained how her ex-partner took his life after she escaped from his domestic abuse. This narrative produces a deep sense of discomfort in the interviewer, as her expectations about suicide bereavement are disrupted. Taking this discomfort as a starting point, we explore what this jarring encounter tells us about dominant and absent narratives of suicide. We interrogate how this narrative of suicide within the context of domestic violence perpetration bumps up against dominant narratives of a "male suicide crisis" and "relationship breakdown," through which men are positioned solely as "victims." Drawing on perspectives from feminist, affective, and reflexive qualitative research, critical suicide studies, and an abductive approach to analysis, we explore how attending to uncomfortable feelings that are generated within the research encounter can enable us to develop more complex, nuanced, and messy understandings of suicide.