The psychotropic self/imaginary: subjectivity and psychopharmaceutical use among heroin users with co-occurring mental illness.

Many people diagnosed with mental illnesses struggle with illicit drug addiction. These individuals are often treated with psychiatric medications, yet little is known about how they experience this treatment. Research on the subjective experience of psychiatric medication use highlights the complex, contradictory, and ambiguous feelings often associated with this treatment. However, for those with mental illness and addiction, this experience is complicated by the need to manage both psychiatric medication and illicit drug use. Using ethnographic data from a study of heroin use in Northeast Ohio, we explore this experience by expanding the pharmaceutical self/imaginary (Jenkins, Pharmaceutical Self: The Global Shaping of Experience in an Age of Psychopharmacology, School for Advanced Research Press, Santa Fe, NM, 2010b) to include psychopharmaceuticals and illicit drugs, what we call the psychotropic self/imaginary. Through this lens we explore the ways participants interpret and manage their psychotropic drug use in relation to sociocultural, institutional, and political-economic contexts. This analysis reveals how participants seek desired effects of legally prescribed and illicit drugs to treat mental illness, manage heroin addiction, and maintain a perceived "normal" self. Participants manage their drug use using active strategies, such as selective use of psychiatric medications, in the context of structural constraints, such as restricted access to mental health care, and cultural contexts that blur distinctions between "good" medicines and "bad" drugs.